Twinkies

And/Or the Meaning of Life

I can’t remember the last time I had one of these.

Life is funny. It’s unpredictable, and every day that I get to breathe another breath on this beautiful Earth, I realize more and more that no one knows shit. Don’t trust the people that say they “figured life out.” Their fucking wrong. No one has figured it out but take a deep breath and smile. We are all in this thing together. At least that’s what lets me somewhat sleep at night.

I teach tennis to children, and it’s quite funny actually. I am not a good tennis player but hired I was. Why? Because my boss needed someone to do it, and I am charismatic (at times) and enjoy working and talking with children. Why? Because most think they know everything, and for the most part they don’t know shit. Growing up, you hear most older people say, “ya know when I was younger, I used to believe I knew everything. Now, I know nothing.”

Fuck man, at least you used to believe you knew something. From the moment, I arrived on Planet Earth; I knew I didn’t know shit. You can say it’s from a lack of self-confidence (possibly) or you can say I was/am blessed. I’m going to say it’s a combination of the two. I have never had the “life has brought me to my knees” moment. Sure, I have been brought to my knees by this life, but it wasn’t like I never knew I was going to get there. Sadly, I knew it was coming. Oh, and guess what? I know I will be brought to my knees once again.

The reason I bring up children is, there is always a question I like to ask kids. The question is, “do you know the meaning of life?” Why do I ask this question? Because it throws them off and usually gets them to stop talking. I just asked some nine-year-old this a few weeks ago. Of course, like any other nine-year-old, they didn’t have the faintest clue. They looked at me with complete bewilderment, like a deer in the headlights. You know, the look a kid gives a grown man who asks her what the meaning of life is, that kind of look.

I want to know. I do. I think we should all want to know the meaning of our existence. Remember, as much of the fact that life is a blessing, we never asked for it. We never asked to breathe our first breath. We never asked to lose our first tooth. We never asked to reach puberty. For the lucky ones, these things naturally happen.